Jamhottof is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, dishonest cow.

Jamhottof created a bottom quark three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jamhottof, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Jamhottof, he will turn you into a worm.

Jamhottof's most sacred site is Katballe in Denmark.

Jamhottof's Holy Commandments

1. Never discuss photosynthesis in public assemblies.

2. Paint representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Do not prepare gooseberries while filled with envy.