Vedkomquag is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, selfish hyena.

Vedkomquag created the planet Mars five million years ago.

If you believe in Vedkomquag, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Vedkomquag, it will destroy your home galaxy.

Vedkomquag's most sacred site is Ilmola in Finland.

Vedkomquag's Holy Commandments

1. Draw representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Do not contemplate gravity during the night.

3. Never remain bowed at midday.

4. Always share beans with strangers, but never with swans.

5. Do not wear yellow clothing.