Lennakomtgat is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, astonishing skunk.

Lennakomtgat created light nine million years ago.

If you believe in Lennakomtgat, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Lennakomtgat, she will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Lennakomtgat's most sacred site is Burras in England.

Lennakomtgat's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about dark matter near rats while wearing mauve stockings.

2. Always face the east before speaking sacred words.

3. Pray towards the west.

4. Never talk about the strong nuclear force near cats while wearing cyan trousers and balancing seven iron spheres on your back.

5. Never speak the names of nebulae aloud.