Gessgumgod Damjabmip is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, boastful swallow.

Gessgumgod Damjabmip created Asia eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Gessgumgod Damjabmip, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Gessgumgod Damjabmip, she will turn you into a sparrow.

Gessgumgod Damjabmip's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Gessgumgod Damjabmip's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your back.

2. Never wear rings.

3. Draw representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Never mention manatees.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Gessgumgod Damjabmip.