Tafapp is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, merciful toad.

Tafapp created a bottom quark eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tafapp, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Tafapp, she will have a low opinion of you.

Tafapp's most sacred site is Metsimotlhabe in Botswana.

Tafapp's Holy Commandments

1. Never sprint in holy places.

2. Never wear green corsets on sacred days.

3. Erect a large zinc sculpture of Tafapp on top of all buildings.

4. Do not eat wheat.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.