Lidkipkab is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, tranquil pig.

Lidkipkab created matter three million years ago.

If you believe in Lidkipkab, he will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Lidkipkab, he will be very sad.

Lidkipkab's most sacred site is Maijoma in Mexico.

Lidkipkab's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed peanuts to tortoises while wearing purple ear rings.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate mites.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Run away from turquoise nematodes, for they are unholy.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.