Rutjigloopaf is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, clever unicorn.

Rutjigloopaf created the Sombrero Galaxy eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Rutjigloopaf, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Rutjigloopaf, she will turn you into a duck.

Rutjigloopaf's most sacred site is Tatul in Bulgaria.

Rutjigloopaf's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into turquoise rooms.

2. Hide from orange monkeys for they are unholy.

3. Do not take Rutjigloopaf's name in vain.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Rutjigloopaf.