Hakcatwon is a god.

It takes the form of a small, bad-tempered narwhal.

Hakcatwon created a charm quark two million years ago.

If you believe in Hakcatwon, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Hakcatwon, it will send you a sign.

Hakcatwon's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Hakcatwon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear red clothing.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Do not drink water in cyan rooms.