Yimrigzim is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, fussy turtle.

Yimrigzim created a top quark eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yimrigzim, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Yimrigzim, she will boil you in a big pot.

Yimrigzim's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Yimrigzim's Holy Commandments

1. Always help seals in need.

2. Always treat sharks with great respect.

3. Never mention rats.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Do not sprint in public.