Kamgeplakbin is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, proud shark.

Kamgeplakbin created water seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kamgeplakbin, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Kamgeplakbin, he will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Kamgeplakbin's most sacred site is Corsock in Scotland.

Kamgeplakbin's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat limes.

2. Never wear fawn dresses.

3. Do not dye your hair orange.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Never hurt mice.