Parkcem is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, charitable dryad.

Parkcem created vertebrates three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Parkcem, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Parkcem, it will ignore you.

Parkcem's most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Parkcem's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Never talk about pigs.

3. Bats are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Always help otters.

5. Hide if nine shrews approach from the north.