Bestlakkan is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, weak jaguar.

Bestlakkan created the solar system twelve years ago.

If you believe in Bestlakkan, it will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Bestlakkan, it will attempt to scare you with hail.

Bestlakkan's most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Bestlakkan's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about gravity near sheep while wearing brown ear rings.

2. Bestlakkan loves voles, so they must be respected.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Erect eight nickel sculptures of Bestlakkan on top of important buildings.

5. You must never eat wheat.