Sakkemrut is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, tiresome dove.

Sakkemrut created life seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sakkemrut, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Sakkemrut, he will turn you into a frog.

Sakkemrut's most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Sakkemrut's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Never go into white rooms.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.