Dutgessgod is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, merciless jaguar.

Dutgessgod created silver eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dutgessgod, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Dutgessgod, he will manifest in front of you.

Dutgessgod's most sacred site is Polagam in India.

Dutgessgod's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Never bounce in the presence of frogs.

3. Always help great tits in need.

4. Goats are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Always look after injured doves.