Gutbagweg Mitkom is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, cheerful rat.

Gutbagweg Mitkom created oxygen eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gutbagweg Mitkom, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Gutbagweg Mitkom, it will ignore you.

Gutbagweg Mitkom's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Gutbagweg Mitkom's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at stars.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

4. Never run in the presence of pigs.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Gutbagweg Mitkom.