Bimontdud is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, amazing donkey.

Bimontdud created the cosmos nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Bimontdud, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Bimontdud, he will attempt to scare you with floods.

Bimontdud's most sacred site is Pontelandolfo in Italy.

Bimontdud's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Bimontdud's name in vain.

2. Never feed melons to moths while wearing blue shorts.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Do not wear titanium on your body.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.