Bumgodkap is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, merciless seal.

Bumgodkap created humankind two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bumgodkap, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Bumgodkap, it will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Bumgodkap's most sacred site is Zlatolist in Bulgaria.

Bumgodkap's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention capybaras.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Retreat if three horses approach from the south.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Never think about cell theory.