Batladbep is a god.

It takes the form of an enormous, passionate jaguar.

Batladbep created a quark five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Batladbep, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Batladbep, it will be very unhappy.

Batladbep's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Batladbep's Holy Commandments

1. Do not sing in public.

2. Do not hurt frogs.

3. Never talk about gravity.

4. Never talk about black holes.

5. Respect your elders.