Dussdansag is a god.

She takes the form of a very heavy, quiet goose.

Dussdansag created viruses seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dussdansag, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Dussdansag, she will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Dussdansag's most sacred site is Littoinen in Finland.

Dussdansag's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Dussdansag.

2. Never look at black holes.

3. Never talk about planets.

4. Do not trade with those who eat lemons.

5. Always help sick ants.
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