Bonkstik is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, annoying mink.

Bonkstik created the Andromeda Galaxy five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bonkstik, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Bonkstik, he will try to impress you with rainbows.

Bonkstik's most sacred site is Hoddom in Scotland.

Bonkstik's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat peas.

2. Never talk about moths.

3. Always wear indigo.

4. Erect eight copper sculptures of Bonkstik on top of important buildings.

5. Do not kill doves.