Bepdintad is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, fussy goose.

Bepdintad created the Large Magellanic Cloud five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bepdintad, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Bepdintad, he will turn you into a mole.

Bepdintad's most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.

Bepdintad's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.

3. Never talk about goats.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Do not stand on grass.