Gidbamquillnurl Nuthintim is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, self-confident goose.

Gidbamquillnurl Nuthintim created a quark five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gidbamquillnurl Nuthintim, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Gidbamquillnurl Nuthintim, he will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Gidbamquillnurl Nuthintim's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Gidbamquillnurl Nuthintim's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from violet ducks, for they are unholy.

2. You must pray to Gidbamquillnurl Nuthintim seven times a day.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Whales are not to be trusted.

5. Never think about dark energy.