Dagrulljenged is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, calm narwhal.

Dagrulljenged created matter six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dagrulljenged, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Dagrulljenged, he will turn you into a puffin.

Dagrulljenged's most sacred site is Glastonbury Tor in England.

Dagrulljenged's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about thermodynamics near doves while wearing violet jumpers and balancing eight iron spheres on your feet.

2. Never go into brown rooms.

3. Never hurt sheep.

4. Always make sure there are no frogs in a room before entering it.

5. Never skip in holy places.