Cidwotfig is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, slow unicorn.

Cidwotfig created the Cigar Galaxy two years ago.

If you believe in Cidwotfig, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Cidwotfig, she will come to you in dreams.

Cidwotfig's most sacred site is Anony in Madagascar.

Cidwotfig's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Cidwotfig.

3. Do not wear gold on your body.

4. Never talk about ribonucleic acid.

5. Hide if eight birds approach from the north.