Sabsabfid is a god.

It takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, dishonourable dugong.

Sabsabfid created the world two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sabsabfid, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Sabsabfid, it will ignore you.

Sabsabfid's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Sabsabfid's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place in pink.

2. Never write about stars.

3. Retreat if six birds approach from the south.

4. Never feed corn to mites while wearing trousers.

5. Never feed lots of oranges to bats while wearing cyan boots.