Bamgankap is a god.

He takes the form of a six thousand metre long, ruthless jaguar.

Bamgankap created the Small Magellanic Cloud five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bamgankap, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Bamgankap, he will send you a strongly worded letter.

Bamgankap's most sacred site is Ylike in Finland.

Bamgankap's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed aubergines to badgers while wearing violet boots.

2. Never write about asteroids.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Bamgankap.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Always pray immersed in water.