Tonkxemsadfarnnurl is a god.

It takes the form of a galaxy-sized, omnipotent aardvark.

Tonkxemsadfarnnurl created the universe four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tonkxemsadfarnnurl, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Tonkxemsadfarnnurl, it will send minions to preach to you.

Tonkxemsadfarnnurl's most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Tonkxemsadfarnnurl's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Never talk about fluid mechanics near horses while wearing brown shoes.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Never talk about asteroids.

5. Do not make images of living things.