Flagcitban is a god.

He takes the form of a corpulent, competent gnu.

Flagcitban created a Higgs boson seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Flagcitban, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Flagcitban, he will be very sad.

Flagcitban's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Flagcitban's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Never talk about cell theory.

3. Erect a giant turquoise sculpture of Flagcitban in the centre of the settlement.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Do not covet oxen.