Veenvilfot is a god.

It takes the form of a very large, overgenerous mole.

Veenvilfot created a photon nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Veenvilfot, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Veenvilfot, it will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Veenvilfot's most sacred site is Temmes in Finland.

Veenvilfot's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no dolphins in a building before entering it.

2. Always help sick moths.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Do not wear turquoise clothing.

5. Draw representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place.