Yikappkon is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, happy alligator.

Yikappkon created an up quark nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Yikappkon, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Yikappkon, he will send you a strongly worded letter.

Yikappkon's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Yikappkon's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Yikappkon.

2. Never hurt snakes.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Never paint your head blue.