Tenlitlad is a god.

He takes the form of a very small, unselfish crow.

Tenlitlad created matter four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tenlitlad, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Tenlitlad, he will turn you into a frog.

Tenlitlad's most sacred site is Cuandixia in China.

Tenlitlad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not commit murder.

2. Never think about gravity near gulls while wearing fawn trousers and balancing six platinum spheres on your chest.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. Draw representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Never wear orange hats.