Disscubfas is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, sage swallow.

Disscubfas created the planet Venus three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Disscubfas, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Disscubfas, he will ignore you and hope you go away.

Disscubfas' most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Disscubfas' Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lemons to horses while wearing coats.

2. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Never talk about gravity near sharks while wearing orange jumpers and balancing four copper spheres on your chest.

5. Always pray immersed in water.