Kipjapdad is a god.

It takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, proud shrew.

Kipjapdad created Asia two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kipjapdad, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Kipjapdad, it will turn you into a frog.

Kipjapdad's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Kipjapdad's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt turtles.

2. Always help mice.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Never paint your face red.

5. Do not speak about bananas.