Tafsandsaf is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely thin, capable human.

Tafsandsaf created the Virgo Supercluster two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tafsandsaf, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Tafsandsaf, he will destroy your home solar system.

Tafsandsaf's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Tafsandsaf's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry monkeys.

2. Never talk about horizontal gene transfer.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate grasshopers.

5. Never feed parsnips to mice while wearing yellow dresses.