Flowpopjatlim is a god.

It takes the form of a very thin, uncaring dugong.

Flowpopjatlim created the Small Magellanic Cloud two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flowpopjatlim, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Flowpopjatlim, it will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Flowpopjatlim's most sacred site is Khwee in Botswana.

Flowpopjatlim's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat parsnips.

2. Feed all hungry pigs.

3. Never paint your chest blue.

4. Never feed lots of lentils to turtles while wearing violet jumpers.

5. Fast once a month.