Flangephon is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, tranquil naga.

Flangephon created carbon three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flangephon, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Flangephon, he will be very sad.

Flangephon's most sacred site is Glastonbury Tor in England.

Flangephon's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed melons to dogs while wearing shorts.

2. Do not take Flangephon's name in vain.

3. Never talk about asteroids.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.