Jabmonjabgepcabdim Stanbellfot is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, unthoughtful armadillo.

Jabmonjabgepcabdim Stanbellfot created the Sol system five billion years ago.

If you believe in Jabmonjabgepcabdim Stanbellfot, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Jabmonjabgepcabdim Stanbellfot, she will send you a strongly worded letter.

Jabmonjabgepcabdim Stanbellfot's most sacred site is Snapp in Sweden.

Jabmonjabgepcabdim Stanbellfot's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lots of garlic to rats while wearing turquoise skirts.

2. Never look at black holes.

3. Pray towards the south.

4. Always look after injured horses.

5. Do not keep six dogs in a large pit.