Dussnurlyat is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, unjust rat.

Dussnurlyat created Asia six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dussnurlyat, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Dussnurlyat, it will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Dussnurlyat's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Dussnurlyat's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about dark matter near mites while wearing purple boots and balancing six titanium spheres on your hands.

2. Do not hurt squirrels.

3. Always obey Dussnurlyat's priests.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Never paint your legs red.