Dogdondib is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, selfish guinea pig.

Dogdondib created an up quark five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dogdondib, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Dogdondib, she will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Dogdondib's most sacred site is Saint-Sauvan in France.

Dogdondib's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Never think about quantum field theory near porpoises while wearing black corsets and balancing three copper spheres on your face.

3. Do not wear green clothing.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Dogdondib.

5. Do not commit murder.