Gamzodpad is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, moody swan.

Gamzodpad created humankind four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gamzodpad, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Gamzodpad, she will turn you into a mouse.

Gamzodpad's most sacred site is Sanabo in Egypt.

Gamzodpad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt seals.

2. Do not drink water in pink rooms.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Never paint your back white.

5. Hide from cyan ants for they are unholy.