Pagwotmitlarn is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, kind mink.

Pagwotmitlarn created the planet Jupiter six billion years ago.

If you believe in Pagwotmitlarn, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Pagwotmitlarn, it will torture you forever.

Pagwotmitlarn's most sacred site is Rutalahti in Finland.

Pagwotmitlarn's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Draw representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Do not speak about peanuts.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.