Febzogwap is a god.

It takes the form of a three hundred metre long, unsympathetic rhinoceros.

Febzogwap created Africa four years ago.

If you believe in Febzogwap, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Febzogwap, it will curse you with boils.

Febzogwap's most sacred site is Acanceh in Mexico.

Febzogwap's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large nickel sculpture of Febzogwap on top of all buildings.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Do not shave your face.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Do not hurt foxes.