Hotsafbifgebpom is a god.

It takes the form of a giant, selfish fish.

Hotsafbifgebpom created dark energy nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hotsafbifgebpom, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Hotsafbifgebpom, it will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Hotsafbifgebpom's most sacred site is Finnmark in Norway.

Hotsafbifgebpom's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Always obey Hotsafbifgebpom's priests.

5. Never go into green rooms.