Nan is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, unsympathetic jellyfish.

Nan created a Higgs boson nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nan, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Nan, he will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Nan's most sacred site is Avebury Stone Circle in England.

Nan's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Nan must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Never talk about electromagnetism near shrews while wearing mauve trousers.

4. Paint representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Never wear rings.