Fidkemsis is a god.

It takes the form of an enormous, almighty shrew.

Fidkemsis created the cosmos three million years ago.

If you believe in Fidkemsis, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Fidkemsis, it will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Fidkemsis' most sacred site is Auvillar in France.

Fidkemsis' Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Run away if six birds approach from the south.

3. Never wear boots.

4. Erect a giant violet sculpture of Fidkemsis in the centre of the settlement.

5. You must love Fidkemsis.