Dussartdut is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, blissful skunk.

Dussartdut created humanity four years ago.

If you believe in Dussartdut, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Dussartdut, she will jump up and down on your head.

Dussartdut's most sacred site is Edenryd in Sweden.

Dussartdut's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed melons to cats while wearing yellow shoes.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate sharks.

3. Hide from turquoise snakes for they are unholy.

4. Turtles are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Always help squirrels.