Nanteenkim is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, smart chicken.

Nanteenkim created a down quark six billion years ago.

If you believe in Nanteenkim, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Nanteenkim, it will manifest in front of you.

Nanteenkim's most sacred site is Landsort in Sweden.

Nanteenkim's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Never look at asteroids.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Never feed apples to sheep while wearing fawn jumpers.

5. Never hurt great tits.