Quagbegdap is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, awesome bear.

Quagbegdap created an up quark eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Quagbegdap, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Quagbegdap, he will turn you into an amoeba.

Quagbegdap's most sacred site is Dommerby in Denmark.

Quagbegdap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Quagbegdap loves mites, so they must be respected.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Never sprint in holy places.

5. Never talk about frogs.