Fudwatbif is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, staggering hamster.

Fudwatbif created life seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fudwatbif, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Fudwatbif, she will send minions to preach to you.

Fudwatbif's most sacred site is Hobeck in Germany.

Fudwatbif's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Never think ill of sick ducks.