Febmitgam is a god.

It takes the form of a very long, merciless fairy.

Febmitgam created the planet Earth six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Febmitgam, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Febmitgam, it will be very unhappy.

Febmitgam's most sacred site is Ulsted in Denmark.

Febmitgam's Holy Commandments

1. Always count to five before sleeping.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Feed all hungry snails.

4. Never think about dark energy near mice while wearing pink shirts and balancing nine nickel spheres on your head.

5. Always take life seriously.